I Am Not a Bar Person

While I have often stepped into a bar for drinks and such, I can't understand how people can make themselves stay in a bar for over 2 hours. I just can't. I'm not talking about those (cheesy) bars where guys like to pickup girls and where girls go to get picked up. No, I'm taking about your regular, run-of-the-mill, decent bars where you can either find a nice cozy spot to chat with friends, or listen to a live band play their music.

I only started going to a bar regularly when I met my boyfriend, who has been patronizing this certain bar since he and his buddies were in college... so that means they've been going regularly for over 10 years. It's like a tradition for them to be there every Friday night (and sometimes they get together on weeknights as well), talking about work and what-nots.

I've been going to this bar for over 2 years now. The novelty has worn off in the first 3 months, and while I like the place and I like the people who go there, I still can't understand how people can stay there for over 2 hours. Aside from the fact that I don't really like beer (I'm more of the hard liquor type), I don't feel comfortable sitting still for more than an hour. The people I'm with talk to me, no arguements there. I know the bar manager, the names of most of the regulars and their girl/boyfriends, and the servers! But I'll take a quiet evening alone inside a coffee house over a bar any day! You can stick me in a coffee house for a whole day, and all I'll need is a good book or a companion to talk with. I can never get that certain ambiance when I'm in a bar, even one that I frequent. Don't get me wrong, the company I'm with in the bar is great. There's just this really huge "But..." going on in my head.

Then there's those bars that have live bands playing on certain nights. One of my boyf's buddies is a musician, so on "gig nights", we all try to troop to the bar where they'll be playing to show our support. I will honestly say that even though his band doesn't play the type of music I listen to, I *DO* listen, because I personally know the band members. I can't explain why, but I'll say that this familiarity with the band members adds something extra to the music.

But going back, another reason why I don't quite enjoy going to bars is the type of music they play. I forgot what music genre my boyfriend placed it under, but to me, it sounds like it's been influenced by jazz, trance and/or electronica. The music feels moody, dramatic, mysterious and floaty, even when the lyrics talk empathically about some psycho muthafucka killa on the loose.

While I have an open mind when it comes to music, I have to honestly say that some types just put me to sleep. Sadly, the music type played by these bands in these bars are almost all the same... and it's the type that puts me to sleep, too. It's not just that either. After one band plays the songs in their set, the next band starts, and OMG, they sound almost exactly like the previous band! I know that it's the same genre, but the songs sound too much alike. Even if the influences were the same, I don't believe that the songs being played are supposed to sound alike. I guess it's partly due to me not liking the music type in the first place, but... Well, let's put it this way: ask me to hum a tune from one of the many gigs I've attended, and I'll not be able to, even if all the songs sound alike.

I just can't dig the music, even though I want to look like I'm enjoying myself.

Why do I still go then? Because my boyfriend likes the music genre. Because my boyf's buddy, who has also become my buddy, needs our support. Because I'm trying to see if I could make myself like going to bars as much as my boyfriend and other people do. Because I can't understand why people stay in bars for over 2 hours.

I get lucky sometimes; there would be a band who's music is just a little bit more interesting than the rest. I'd perk up in my seat and order a coke or something (not good to always drink hard). I've rarely been impressed enough by a band for me to start bobbing my head in time with the beat. But after the set is over, it goes back to the same, sleepy music, and I slump back in my seat, uninterested.

It's not really a big improvement over going to a bar to just have drinks and then stay there for over 2 hours.

To each their own, I suppose. I'll always be one of those who feel out of place the minute they step into a bar.

Maybe I should just stick to coffee houses...