I Quest for the Dark Tower...

I quest for the Dark Tower!



This has been my YM status message for the past few weeks. Why? Because I have just finished reading "The Dark Tower" book 7, which is the final book of Stephen King's magnum opus.

If you haven't read the series, you are missing out on more than half of your mortal life already! Stop reading this blog entry, and go pick up the first book (The Dark Tower 1 - The Gunslinger) to begin your quest.

If you've read the DT series, but have not finished reading Book 7, stop reading this blog entry, otherwise, I will spoil the book ending for you as I plan to discuss it a bit. Believe me, you WILL NOT enjoy having the story spoiled for you.

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Decided to continue? Very well then, folken...
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I started reading the DT series sometime back in either grade school or high school. I don't remember when exactly, but the timeline would be some 10 to 12 years ago. Yes, dear reader, it took Stephen King over 15 years to complete this masterpiece epic.

I've been hooked on the story of Roland's quest ever since I began. It wasn't really so much that I wanted to know the ending, but rather, I wanted to join Roland on this "Knight's Quest" to save the Dark Tower. Each time each DT book came out, I was so desperate to continue the journey onwards. Waiting 10-12 years for an end to the quest is not pretty. As I said, I wanted to join Roland on his quest, and it was a long and weary path to the Dark Tower, say thankya. Not only did the waiting time for the books make it long, but the way the story progressed made it seem so much longer.

I wanted the quest to end happily (I am such a sucker for happy endings), even though I was pretty sure that the losses incurred during such a journey would be great-- too great, in fact, to pass off as another event. Each loss that happened to Roland and his ka-tet cut through me like a hundred knives each time. My eyes watered with unshed tears when the ka-tet first broke with Eddie's death, and then gushed freely not soon after as Jake (my most beloved character in the story) died shortly afterwards. To quote one person in the DarkTower forums, "King is a cold and cruel bastard." It was true... but then again, what else would one expect when the gain is just as great? There must always be a balance in the wheel of Ka, and when the scale tips to one side, Ka dictates that the balance be regained.

Of course, while I was not happy with the ending, I must say that there was no other ending that could have been possible, and that no other ending could have finished the quest better. For Roland to keep having a "Groundhog Day" (as in the Bill Murray movie) until he finally lives his life right is the only way to serve one's destiny. The only path to living life. Ka is a wheel. That is the only truth there is.

What is life about anyway? Why are we born? Why do we live the way we do? Why are we here? Why do we exist? Is there any greater purpose that we must fulfill before we can say that we really lived? Are we all destined to repeat our lives again and again until we fulfill the destiny we are given? If one does not believe in destiny, what is the purpose of life? Of existence? Are we supposed to live a fulfilling life? How can we say that we DID live a fulfilling life? What are the factors that make life seem fulfilling? What drives us to do what we do? What do we need to do for the wheel to stop turning? The questions go on and on.

And so I quest for the Dark Tower.

Note: I know this was a very vague piece of monologue, but if you've read the DT series, then you know exactly what I am talking about. :) So go pick up the books and quest for your own Dark Tower!

Writer's Block

Holy crap!

It's been months since my last update... and yet, I find that I have nothing to talk about still... :(

Well, I do have a couple of gripes.

I've been going through some of my extra curricular projects list, and whoa! It's long and getting longer still... most of it are writing-related (such as this blog). Man, I used to be such an avid writer. Does the working life really kill your inner abilities? Does it really kill the special skills one develops over the growing years?

Take for example, my writing (and back to that again...)

Man, I used to be such an avid writer (yes, I'm repeating myself to stress this into my poor, overworked, stressed brain). I used to be able to put down unintelligible thoughts into coherent words and sentences merely by putting my hands to a keyboard and typing away. I stopped being an avid writer some time during 4th year high school. I was a "dead writer" all throughout college, then started writing again a few months after I graduated. It was a good flux of thoughts and ideas for a few months, then I lost the drive again.

It's been an off-again, on-again thing for me ever since.

Take for example, the Inu Yasha fanfic that I started working on a few months after I graduated. I posted this publicly (courtesy of www.fanfiction.net), and I updated that fanfic regularly, adding a new chapter at least once every 2 weeks. One thing about updating regularly is that you soon get a fan-following... which was really encouraging. The knowledge that people I don't know were actually taking time to sit down and read something I've made was inspiring, to say the least. I was on a roll.

Then near Chapter 9 of my 2nd fanfic, I backed myself into a plot-corner, and got the worst case of writer's block I've ever had the misfortune to experience.

That fanfiction has been waiting for Chapter 10 for almost 2 years.

I was able to get myself out of it after I finally made myself sit down and WORK on the damn thing. After Chapter 10 was posted, however, I once again found that I "lost the touch". :(

So here I am, in my favorite Starbucks haunt with my laptop, looking at an open word document with "Chapter 11" screaming in front of me... still very blank.

Now what?

While staring blankly into my screen, I started thinking about my other, unfinished (and ongoing) projects, such as my 3 blogsites (you're reading 1 of them right now), my 2 fanfics, my unfinished entries for numerous fiction-writing contests that ended months ago and my not-yet-started epic fiction story that I've had in my head for over 10 years. I doubt this epic fiction thing will ever get written... it involves a lot of necessary historical and mythological research, which I simply cannot find time for.

Well, here's one good thing... bemoaning the loss of my love for writing enabled me to update my blog. *rolls eyes*

Useless update, bah...